The Survivals of Jewels

Learning to thrive through sharing my true stories, healing through God, healing through crafts, helping others, and helping others gain better health. Please note, names have been changed for protection.

February 11, 2013 February 11, 2013

Filed under: Journal — The_Survivals_of_Jewels @ 6:34 pm
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Just put stuffed green peppers in the oven. Excited to see how they come out. I will post a pic and the recipe online under Lean & Green recipes.

So, here’s the update with the Mel situation. He said he was coming up after wanting to apply at a place I referred him to. He got a hotel that was way far from me. Then, when I said let’s meet, I have the next few days off, he said it was too late and pouring rain, he would never find me. Anyone that knows where I live, knows it is super easy to find. And it was not raining, in fact I have only seen it pour a few times since I have been here. It was only drizzling. And it was only 6pm. So, I blew it off and he said he needs to get a hotel on my side of town and he needs me to take him to the place to apply the next day. So I told him when I would be awake, gave him my address and went to bed. I texted him when I was awake with no response. I waited for him to respond for an entire day. When I heard nothing, I texted him one last time stating that this was the third time I have cancelled plans for him and I just don’t know what to say. I have never heard from him since. I’m not sweating it though. I wasn’t completely sure where this was going anyways. And I have many things to focus on. So, I’m not getting down. Definitely won’t forget him though.

Had a terrible gout flare up last week. It had gotten so bad that I couldn’t put any weight on it. Even sitting down, it throbbed terribly. One night, I gave up and couldn’t take it anymore. I took every pill I could get my hands on. But not too much of each. No more than the recommended dose. Two percocet, two naproxen, two vitamin D, and two cholcrys. Praise God, it worked. Now it’s just a dull ache. However, it upset my stomach so bad that I was getting sick at work. But now, it’s all good.

Prayers….a positive meeting tomorrow, no violence or elopement at work, Paul to find more ways to make money and pay his bills, Darla’s dad to have a peaceful passing

Feelings….dull pain, lots of energy, feeling healthier.

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January 25th, 2013 January 25, 2013

Filed under: Journal — The_Survivals_of_Jewels @ 2:57 am
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I completed alot of changes to the blog for a better look and flow. I included a Definitions and a Links page. Please know that if you need help, please don’t hesitate to get some. You are not alone. Email me if you like and I will do whatever I can to help. I intend to update the rest of the Surviving the Different Abuse guys, one a day. That’s four more posts. It’s hard for me to write them. Although I know it is healing for me to do so, it is just hard to get my mind to remember everything and not upset myself. So please bear with me.

I did a bunch of cooking today to prepare things for my work week. Things should be easier now.

Praise report! I got hired at a Christian company doing the same work. This will be a more medical group home and the violence will be gone. I am so grateful for that. I think I was getting too old for the violence. The only issue is that it doesn’t start until February 25th. That is quite a ways off. I guess I just stick it out until then.

Got some of my tax forms in the last few days. Looking forward to getting that going.

Prayers….no more violence at my current job, a rise in integrity at work, Paul to get a better job as well, that these posts will help not only me heal as they are doing, but for them to help others as well, that You can show me how to use these experiences I have been through to help others.

Feelings….my knees, ankles and tops of my feet hurt so bad, they have for days

 

January 14, 2013 January 14, 2013

Filed under: Journal — The_Survivals_of_Jewels @ 2:52 am
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Did alot of adjusting to the blog to make it better. Hopefully this helps. It seems the more I study and learn about blogging, the more changes I make.

I decided last night to help Paul make some money by offering him a percentage in selling some things on Ebay for me. So we agreed on him receiving 40% of profits of everything that sells that’s mine and 100% of what he sells that’s his. Hopefully this helps us get some spending money. Then, we went through the storage area and found tons of things to sell and give away.

Got all my pictures backed up on Snapfish today as well. This took forever as the computer kept freezing up. I figured out why too. Stupid Skype settings wouldn’t change and kept crashing. So I tried uninstalling it and failed. Paul succeeded.

I’m no longer feeling hungry all the time. I only get hungry when it is close to time to eat. That’s kinda cool. Also, I don’t feel cravings.

Prayers….that tomorrow’s interview goes well, that Paul gets a second job or more hours, that River’s Way is the home church for us

Feelings….accomplished, got alot done today

 

January 6, 2013 January 6, 2013

Filed under: Journal — The_Survivals_of_Jewels @ 8:52 am
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I decided to give myself a reward at each milestone of my weight loss. So, I started at 338lbs. I’m thinking that when I can break the 300 mark, I will go get a makeover. A hair trim, hair color, eyebrow waxing, manicure and pedicure. Before I moved here, I saw that Paul Mitchell School is here. I will look into that tonight.

We weren’t able to go to church today as the new we wanted to go to today didn’t have services this evening. But I’m emailing a lady from there regularly.

Mel called today. Again, he said all the things I wanted to hear. Asked me why I wanted to stay in Portland, told me he’s always happy when he gets to talk to me, and that he will support me in my weight loss. Just for me to know, its doesn’t make a difference what I look like, he loves me for me. And thinks I’m beautiful either way. He also explained his not being able to text or call, and his frustration with the metroplex. He’s frustrated as well with my ever changing schedule. Not sure what I can do to change that.

Prayers….for another safe night at work, for the terrific ministry that Rivers Way has, for Paul’s first day at work to go well.

Rants….why when you ask for a coffee at McDonalds with splenda, do they give you a cold coffee with creamer? Thank God I was able to go back and get a new one. If this happens again though, I will complain.

 

January 5, 2013 January 5, 2013

Filed under: Journal — The_Survivals_of_Jewels @ 12:16 pm
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Day two of the diet and I’m still gassy and crampy in my lower abdomen. Everything I read says the pain will stop, it’s just temporary. We will see. Today was easier overall. However, I ran into one bug. The math of when to eat required me to eat 7 times instead of 6. I realized that this is gonna be hard to accomplish with my crazy sleep schedule. I work varying shifts and sleep speratically at times. Everything I’ve seen online tells me to never go over three hours without eating. So until I hear back from my coach, that’s what I will do.

All this healthiness has got me thinking on more ways to improve my life. I decided to post stickys to remind me of oral health habits and calendars for me and John individually to schedule cleaning and see each others schedule. I hope this helps.

Paul got a job at Burger King. Hey, at least its a check. He starts on Monday.

Mel has been telling me he loves me. I’m still not sure what is up with him. He is very private and seems to show no interest in what I like. Confusing. This I leave in God’s hands.

Prayers….Kayla’s health, she’s in so much pain even after the tumor was removed over a year ago, thanks for Paul’s job, a safe day at work, for Mel to open up fully

Feelings….excited, confused, cramps, major gas and starving

 

January 1, 2013 January 1, 2013

Filed under: Journal — The_Survivals_of_Jewels @ 10:08 am
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After work, I picked up Paul from his Bronie party. Apparently he had a blast. I’m glad he’s finally making friends. Woke up after 4 hours and went to Janet’s house for her housewarming party. I was quiet as usual, but had fun. Its incredible how stupid you feel when you’re surrounded by intelligent people. Everyone was using big words that I didn’t understand. Janet is gonna give me info for a church like hers that’s close to where I live.

Got to work and it was a disaster. Looked like a tornado had hit the home. Then Mel started texting and saying he had been texting me with no response. However, I’ve had a signal all day and nothing. Then I got to thinking…more things don’t add up. For example, he insisted he had pics of me sitting at a desk. I don’t even own a desk. He was texting someone else while with me a lot. His story on where he lives keeps changing. Tonight, he sent me a pic of him with a bus behind him that is the same as is close to my work, while he’s supposedly in Salem, and wouldn’t answer where he was. He said he called and left me a voicemail the day he was supposed to meet my family and I checked it and nothing, not even a missed call. Then, tonight, during our conversation, he said he thought I fell asleep after I asked him a question. He said I told him I was falling asleep. I never said anything of the sort, I’m working grave and wide awake. When I called him on it, he said he texted the wrong person. Things are just fishy. I don’t know what to think but I’m definitely taking it slow, he is hiding something.

So, I finally got the guts to call a rape hotline over the incident on 12/18. I just hope I have the guts to actually go to the nurse to be checked out. I’m scared and nervous.

Prayers….that I have the guts to follow through, that everything comes to light with Mel, a new job for Paul and me, another safe night at work

Feelings….the back of my neck hurts, which is how my fibromyalgia spells start, scared, nervous, confused

 

December 31, 2012 December 31, 2012

Filed under: Journal — The_Survivals_of_Jewels @ 8:23 am
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HAPPY NEW YEARS
Mom went home today. 😦 We went to Ihop to have breakfast before she left and took a family photo. Turned out sweet. I just noticed how fat I am. This is something I’m definitely stopping this year.
Paul went to a Bronie Meetup MLP new years party. He says he is having a good time. The buses ran free tonight. So I know he will get home okay. I heard from Mel today. Real short, but good.

Prayers….that everyone gets home safe tonight, that we can find new jobs, that this becomes the best year ever, that my relationship with God grows stronger, that those who suffered loss this year heal and draw closer to God this year

Feelings….tired as usual, lonely