January 6, 2013 January 6, 2013

I decided to give myself a reward at each milestone of my weight loss. So, I started at 338lbs. I’m thinking that when I can break the 300 mark, I will go get a makeover. A hair trim, hair color, eyebrow waxing, manicure and pedicure. Before I moved here, I saw that Paul Mitchell School is here. I will look into that tonight.

We weren’t able to go to church today as the new we wanted to go to today didn’t have services this evening. But I’m emailing a lady from there regularly.

Mel called today. Again, he said all the things I wanted to hear. Asked me why I wanted to stay in Portland, told me he’s always happy when he gets to talk to me, and that he will support me in my weight loss. Just for me to know, its doesn’t make a difference what I look like, he loves me for me. And thinks I’m beautiful either way. He also explained his not being able to text or call, and his frustration with the metroplex. He’s frustrated as well with my ever changing schedule. Not sure what I can do to change that.

Prayers….for another safe night at work, for the terrific ministry that Rivers Way has, for Paul’s first day at work to go well.

Rants….why when you ask for a coffee at McDonalds with splenda, do they give you a cold coffee with creamer? Thank God I was able to go back and get a new one. If this happens again though, I will complain.

December 25, 2012 December 25, 2012

Terrific Christmas at Greg’s. Played with the kids. Smiles and happiness. Noone complained or fought. This is Christmas. Although mom’s flight got moved to tomorrow due to snow in San Francisco, I’m somewhat grateful as I can now get better sleep.

Rant….It’s 1:45am, just got home from work, haven’t slept in almost two days, just found out my boss bold face lied to get a coworker fired with witnesses and tried to rally people to back her lies, I’ve spoken to someone already about this grouphome and it got worse, I can’t work for a company with no integrity, but have to have a job….this makes fail #3 for Portland….#2 being James and #1 being finding a church that we feel disconnected with.

Prayers….Lord please make the reason why You sent me here clear as day, it has to be more than family, help to avoid lying and getting involved in gossip, help me be a shining example of You

Feelings….distraught, discouraged, tired, knees hurt

December 22, 2012 December 22, 2012

I got to work today only to discover I was expected to work where I am not trained. Also, I’m expected to give medications when I’m not certified to do so. I’m not sure why this grouphome refuses to follow the rules of the company and state. I’m not sure how this job will unfold for me.
I decided to add my weight every so often to my blog in hopes to review my progress. As of now I have not started my life change yet.

Weight…335lbs.

Prayers…a raise in John’s faith, Kayla’s health, my church to become more aware of new people to keep them coming instead of forgetting them after three visits, please make this physically ill feeling go away

Feelings…frustrated with my and I haven’t even been here a month, headache, neck and upper back ache, nausea

Rants….why isn’t integrity and professionalism important anymore in the workplace?

December 21, 2012 December 21, 2012

So today I talked to my pastor’s wife in Wisconsin and she suggested to start a blog. She knows everything I have been through. So I decided to write different things in my life that affect me and the way I live in attempts to find someone out there that has been through similar stuff. Although I don’t think anyone has experienced what I have. But if someone has, please know you are not alone.

I also ordered a new and hopefully last diet plan (TSFL) today. Last time I was on a scale it said 338. That’s scary. It should be here after xmas.

Prayers … John to find a job, that this blog helps someone, that this diet works, that my walk with Him comes back to full swing, that true love finds me, that my family finds Him

Feelings … I’m nervous to be making these new changes in my life. I’m nervous to put my business out there. I’m not feeling physically well, headaches and nausea.

Rants … Doesn’t anyone realize the end of the world will never happen upon prediction as the Mayan calendar ended yesterday. G-d said He would come like a thief in the night. This means no one will ever know.